FAA Approves Use of Fake Emergencies to Increase Passenger Attention to Pre-Flight Briefing

FAA Approves Use of Fake Emergencies to Increase Passenger Attention to Pre-Flight Briefing

FAAWASHINGTON, USA. Officials emerging from the Federal Aviation Administration’s quarterly How can we get them to pay attention? seminar were all smiles today, as it was revealed that this time would be different. Previous attempts to keep passengers focused involving song, dance or Ming Dynasty costumes all failed to gain traction.

“It’s psychological” said Dan Bran, Chief Strategist for Passenger Communications at the US agency. “Airlines don’t have to actually go through with the fake emergencies, but knowing that they can means passengers will be more cautious, and will finally start paying attention to that damned briefing.”

Bran added “There are various possibilities how this can be done if airlines do want to go through with it. Take off runs can be aborted while alarms are blaring; after boarding is completed, water can be spilled on the apron while on the PA someone says ‘is that fuel?’ Airlines have to get creative. You gotta keep ‘em on their toes.”

FAA preflight briefing fake emergencies
Soon passengers will start paying more attention. Image credit: Wikipedia.